Damn tired...

I'm really tired today, so I'll be brief...

Going to Germany:

Pros
1. Great exposure
2. Better pay when I come back
3. Better career when I come back

Conclusion: Better life with more money and less struggle

Cons
1. 3 and 1/2 months is not enough to learn what I need to learn. And it's in German. Worse! I'll end up with nothing.
2. I'll disappoint my dad and his friend and cause my dad to lose face.
3. I'll be very lonely and afraid there and suffer for 3 months.
4. I might even run home 1 month later, crying. That would lead to #2.
5. Since #1, there may be no impact on my career and I'd have wasted my time.
6. My dad needs to invest lots of money for me to get there and it'll be wasted.

Conclusion: No guarantee it'll turn out positively and in the process, I may be scarred.

I have a very interesting story to do with Con #4. There was a fella in my dad's company who was sent to Germany for 6 months training. He came back within a month, crying. A grown man. Maybe back then there was no internet. but still, it illutrates how difficult it is to be away from home. Especially for a person such as myself. I need family, I need love, 24/7.

If I don't try now, I may regret and blame myself for life. If I try but fail, can I blame others for the rest of my life?

So the question remains, to go, or not to go. I NEED FEEDBACK!!!